A few thoughts on why, even though “all lives matter” is a valid statement, we should be mindful and empathetic and not use it to hijack #BlackLivesMatter, which is a movement literally begging for people to pay attention to the social inequalities facing black people.
I want to use a practical, very specific example that may help provide better context outside the seemingly controversial race issue.
I started @FundiBots in 2010, using robotics as a fun and practical way for Ugandan students to experience the magic of science.
As the years went on, our team and regional reach expanded and the number of students we trained grew exponentially (10,000+ to date). But something started to show in our data: we had far fewer girls in our robotics classes than boys. For every 10 boys, we had about 3 girls.
And this was in urban government schools, so that was troubling, even though the ratios in international/private schools were much better.
But, as we got deeper into the villages, that number became smaller, with some classes that were filled almost exclusively with boys.
We needed to get more girls engaged in science early, because, and this is the important part:
Fewer girls were getting into STEM classes and even fewer were finishing those STEM classes. This meant fewer were doing STEM at university level and so STEM careers had fewer women.
So we started @FundiGirls with the sole aim of providing EQUITABLE support to get more girls into STEM spaces, support them in sciences, etc.
And one of the first questions that popped up was “WhAt AbOuT ThE BoYs? Will there be a Fundi Boys?”
Just like “BUT ALL LIVES MATTER”.
The main problem with statements like these is the assumption that the playing field is equal. Or rather, that the suffering field is equal.
Yes, every demographic has challenges, BUT for some, they are deeply rooted systemic challenges that are unique and biased against them.
And for these people, their issues urgently need attention.
As an example, let’s explicitly explore the deeply biased systemic challenges that most girls in Uganda face.
Why were girls (rural and urban) dropping off so rapidly and so nonchalantly from science classes?
The answer? The entire system was skewed against them. We’ve asked hundreds, if not thousands of girls these questions over the course of four years.
The answers, almost always come back the same, some with more gravity than others.
Here are just a few of the drop-off points.
Drop-off 1: “Sciences are hard.”
Everyone can do sciences, but they generally need more time to learn and grasp. But if you’re a girl, chances are you’re being told to first do chores before doing school work. Before the day starts, you’re already behind the boys.
So girls consciously (and subconsciously) opt for classes that are easier to pass, to reduce the academic stress they have to deal with.
Parents and teachers see them lagging behind and assume it’s because they can’t manage sciences, so they encourage the girls to pursue arts.
Drop-off 2: “Those things are for boys.”
A lot of girls (rural and urban) are constantly told that some subjects/careers/games/ideas are not meant for women. For example, rough, dirty things likes machines. And they are constantly reminded that a woman’s place is in the kitchen.
Drop-off 3: Menstrual Health.
Nearly 60% of girls in rural Uganda miss school once a month because of menstrual health challenges (access to pads, dirty toilets, no privacy, stigma, etc). In a year, this girl will miss a quarter of her classes because of her menstrual cycle.
Guess which subjects suffer the most when you miss classes? Sciences. I facilitate science learning for a living; it is incredibly hard to catch up if you miss foundational principles. And that lack of knowledge builds up until you give up and opt for simpler subjects.
Drop-off 4: Teachers.
The majority of science teachers are male. Why? Because girls leave sciences early and never get to the point where they pursue it long enough to become teachers.
So girls have fewer science role models to look up to and get advice from.
Additionally, if your teachers are not invested in your growth or if they are misogynistic men (refer to drop-off 2), they will condescendingly advise you to try simpler subjects or course units, perpetuating the stereotype that some subjects are too hard for girls to handle.
Drop-off 5: Fellow students.
Teenage years are rough years in which self-esteem is made or broken. For girls, there are a lot of physical, psychological and academic attacks, and they come primarily from male peers. PS: It’s much, much worse in under-privileged schools.
Drop-off 6: Societal Pressure For Marriage.
Many rural families marry girls off at an early age. Also, sexual abuse, rapes, pregnancies etc. are tragic realities for young girls.
Inevitable, the first thing that suffers is school, while the boys happily continue onward.
The list is endless and many of us (particularly men) find it hard to understand, because it doesn’t happen to us.
We say things like “well, they should be stronger” or “they should report the rape” or “they asked for it” or my personal favorite “I survived the same system.”
We like to point to the success stories and say, “Well, she made it, so they should all be able to make it.”
That is not how life works; outliers are a statistical anomaly.
It takes tremendous willpower, grit and luck to succeed in a system that’s heavily stacked against you.
So when we decide to dedicate more resources to supporting those that need it most, we’re not saying boys don’t matter. We’re not saying rich girls in fancy schools don’t matter.
We’re saying, this specific group has this very big problem and we want to address it. Urgently.
So yes, all lives matter, but right now, the house that is on fire is the black house, and it has been on fire for a long, long time.
And we need to give it urgent attention before it burns out of control.
It really isn’t too much to ask, is it?
